Our plans, and life in general, can kind of get away from us in some of the different seasons of life, am I right?
I never would have thought I would write the first book for the Kingdoms of Broken Stone series in less than a year and then take more than two years to get started on the second. I apologize to those who’ve waited patiently to continue reading the story, especially if you were hoping the next announcement from me would be in regards to the next installment.
During this season of life I’ve moved twice, had a job change, and, I hope this makes up from some of the disappointment, gotten a puppy.
(To be honest, the puppy was recent, so she didn’t really have an impact in delaying my writing.)
Her name is Lucy. She’s quite a bit bigger than this now, but I wanted to find the cutest picture I could to smooth things over a bit for not having the next book even remotely ready for enjoyment.
While a lot of life has happened, the main reason not much happened in the way of writing was my own lack of motivation and discouragement.
Perhaps I didn’t have much of a reason to be discouraged in terms of how many copies my first book sold. I shouldn’t have expected a large number when it was self-published, virtually lacking a cover, and my circle of influence, or “reach”, isn’t very large.
But I was disappointed nonetheless. Disappointed and discouraged.
So I didn’t really want to write the next book or any other book or do any writing of any kind. I focused on work and family and didn’t set aside any meaningful amount of time to write. I’d put so much of my time into writing, pitching, and pushing the book and the return wasn’t anywhere near what I hoped it would be. I had tried to set reasonable expectations and to take to heart the genuinely encouraging comments and reviews I received from those kind enough to read something I’d written, but even as my head told my heart to be happy with the blessings I’d received from others who read it, my heart still hoped it would sell enough to justify the amount of time I spent on it.
Silly, I know, but as much as I tried to adjust my hopes to something resembling what could be reasonably expected given the circumstances, I suppose the imagination that helps you write a fantasy book creeps into other parts of life as well.
For me, there is a funny set of emotions tied to writing and then asking people to pay for what I’ve written. I’d really like a lot of people to buy my book, but I’m also terrified about what they will think when they read it. I’d really like them to love what I’ve written, but if they do, will I disappoint them if the next thing I write isn’t as good? I’d like to be able to say that I write for an audience of one and hope to please God by using what He has given me, and maybe sometimes I’m able to have that perspective, but I often care about what others think and how many people read it, whether it is a book, article, or blog post.
Some of what I have written here may come across as ungrateful to those who’ve helped write and publish my work and to those who have bought and read my book. That is not my heart at all. In one sense, I am humbled beyond any words I can write that people would help me in this venture and that they would spend their resources (money and time) to purchase and read my work. I thank God for each of you and hope you have felt it was time and money well spent.
But it would be dishonest of me not to tell you all that has been in my heart and mind. Your kindness has earned that.
I do have something for you to read that, while it isn’t exactly new, has been edited, reworked, and assembled in a small collection.
Before I wrote Boy of Dreams, I’d been working on writing daily devotionals. I had hoped to write enough to fill a year, but I only got through 120-130 or so before I switched to writing the book. I had posted them here on my site for anyone to read.
At some point I had the idea to edit and assemble them in a small book. I wasn’t ready to begin full on writing again, but I thought if I worked on a writing project I could start to get back in the rhythm.
What I didn’t realize at the time was how much I needed to read the various scriptures and truths I’d written in the past. Many of them are written directly from places of weakness and struggle and were just as applicable to me now as when I first wrote them. The circumstances might be different, but many of the underlying heart and mind conditions are the same.
I planned to have one collection of 100 devotions, but I had to break it into two because you are only allowed to quote a certain number of verses from any given translation of the Bible without special consent. So I figured the easier thing to do would be to create two smaller devotionals of 50 each.